Dominance Escalation: Orgasm Control

Let's set the scene: your lovely lady is laying on her back. She has an eye mask on, wrists tied to each side of the bed. You've already relaxed her with a nice oil massage and given her an orgasm or two. Her cheeks are bright red from how flushed she is.

There's a vibrator on her clit and two fingers inside of her. You feel her legs starting to shake, and you know she wants to cum again.

Well, that's when you stop.

Don’t give her all she wants, yet...

Orgasm Control and Denial

Orgasm control and orgasm denial is another crucial part of a dominant sex session. For most men, it's actually one of the toughest parts of the interaction. Not only do you need to learn how to give women orgasms (a whole series on its own), but you also need to defy both your instincts and hers at the moment.

She will beg, she will plead, but do not relent, soldier! Resist the pressure to let her cum. She will try to convince you that it’s what she wants in the moment, but remember, this is not a regular sex session—the decision to let her cum is all yours to make.

Assert your stance with a confident, smirking attitude. Get close to her ear and whisper, "Is there something you want, lil girl?" Lift up the blindfold and have her look you in the eyes as she begs you.

Sure, it’s cruel—but in a good way. Here’s why:

Female Orgasm is Not Linear

In many ways, our orgasms are not that different from our sexual energy. Male orgasm is more linear and predictable. You could slowly (or quickly) build it up to a tipping point of ejaculation, and you'll be a happy man till the next round.

Female orgasm, on the other hand, is more fickle and unpredictable. It moves in wavy lines—up, down, left, right—occasionally wandering off into dark alleys before heading into the forest. Building up your woman's explosive, full-body orgasm requires time, patience, and a hefty amount of forearm muscle power.

As you can see from my oversimplified, award-worthy work of art above, in order to give her that earth-shattering experience, you’ll have to constantly deny her the smaller orgasms she craves. Do not take her frustration and anger as a sign of messing things up. Just give her a confident, relaxed smile and tell her, “You haven’t earned it yet!”

Negative Feelings Are Not Bad

A good orgasm will require you to stir up as many contradicting emotions as you can. You want excitement, disappointment, frustration, joy, and surprise, just to name a few. Take all of those, mix them up with a hefty dose of patience, and you’ll give her an experience no man has ever given her before.

Those emotions will carve your name deeply within her subconscious and create a cosmic bond between you two. If you're still a beginner or haven’t established enough trust, I’d advise against going too hard on the degradation/humiliation play, as it could risk losing the momentum and get her inside her head (there’s another article on that coming soon).

To amplify those emotions, you need to keep bringing her to the boiling point. Have her beg for the big finish, promise it, and back off. By the third or fourth time, she will be in a state akin to mania, and her body will start to shiver. Place your grip on her neck and whisper all your nasty thoughts about owning her body as you finally let her release the tension you’ve built up over the past hour or two.

After the Full-Body Orgasm

As her muscles contract and her moans get louder, keep your fingers inside and don’t stop moving until she’s finished. Her insides will become extremely sensitive, so it’ll take some experience and practice to know the specific moment to stop moving.

It’s important to keep your fingers steady and still inside of her for another 30-60 seconds. Then, gently and slowly pull them out. The pull-out itself is intense and will give her a little icing on the cake. Draw your body close to hers and feel her rapid breathing on your neck slow down as she slowly adjusts back to reality.

This is a sensationally bonding moment between you two. Give her a few moments to relax, then start moving the tips of your fingers across her head, neck, and back. This is very soothing, as her whole body becomes extremely sensitive to your touch post-orgasm.

That’s it for the orgasm control chapter of our series. Stay tuned, my devils!